didnt want to blog initially..until i was so freaking pissed with someone..

thought national day would be a peaceful day for me at home, to be able to do my homework and revise in PEACE..but apparently my parents did a splendid job in spoiling it...in fact they totally pissed me off..

i was happily doing a chem exam paper in my study room until i heard some knocking sound on the door..so went to look but saw no one..well went back to my room and heard the knockings again..yea so the cycle repeated and i cant be bothered anymore to response to the 3rd knocking..then heard my parents opening the door so went out to greet them..well tts my parents' rule..so if they're home and i dun greet then i'll be dead...

yea so guess wad was the first thing tt my mom said?? "are you deaf or wad?? must be slping right tts y never help to open the door?!!? ......." (the rest are up to u guys to imagine..cant be bothered to type out wadever crap she said) welll tts a perfectly nice way to respond to someone who is greeting you with a smiley face isnt it?? fine i didnt wanted to quarrel with her so helped to carry those boxes of food that they'd used to pray before tt into the kitchen..ya so as what i'd expected, she followed into the kitchen and started bossing around, telling me off on what to do, screaming at me for the so-called 'slow actions' according to her despite the fact tt i was trying to register every single task tt she'd just simply rattered off...HA! who says tt females can multi-task well???? can i shoot tt person to death?

so by then i was alr very much pissed of when she vent all her anger at me the moment they came home..then while i was trying to pack those stuff into places where they ought to be at, she asked where was my piggish brother (the 'piggish' was added in by me...how will she ever BEAR to call my DEAR brother piggish???? not till the day i'm dead man..) so told her tt he went out after lunch, not coming back for dinner and staying out yadayada...then she asked a qns tt i'll definitely catagorise as retarded.."your brother is not at home isit?" OMG how i wish i can faint and die at tt moment..."didnt i just told you that he WENT OUT after lunch???" well tt kinda shut her off..

yea so all the chores were being thrown to me...while my parents sat at the table enjoying muffins and coffee WITHOUT ASKING ME IF I WOULD LIKE TO JOIN THEM! isnt it like WOW?? fine i'll just take it as it slips their mind and not tt i'm insignificant..lets just take it tt way la huh? so i was clearing all the stuff from rice to vegetables to can food to fruits....alright fine if tts what my mother claimed as the trainings before i got married (like i'll ever get married in 5 years time..) then so be it..i mean i'm more or less used to it coz i'd been doing it since young...but wad hurt me most was the words tt she said during their lovely 'tea session'

"ehh ji ran er zi mei you hui lai chi fan, na wo men wan shang sui bian qu wai mian mai lai chi jiu ke yi le la..bu yong zhu dao zhe yang ma fan ma..." (ok i shall translate this to english...she said to my father tt since my brother is not coming back for dinner, then might as well just buy something back to eat tonight..so that she dont have to go through the trouble of cooking..)

wah instant heartbreak sia...as far as i know...even though when i'm not coming back for dinner, she will still insist on cooking dinner for my brother though he said its alright to buy dinner outside...see the vast difference between me and my brother?!?!?!?!??! so WHAT does she takes me for?? someone whom she pats like a puppy when she's in a good mood, makes you cuddle beside her and stroke your hair...but when she's in a foul mood, the first one to kenna will DEFINITELY be ME..wads this man..first one to turn to when in trouble will be me...first one to vent her anger will also be me! so tts like so FAIR to me huh?

this isnt the first time...those who knows me well will know more other stories...everytime when something is wrong she wun even bother to find out who the hell made the mess and she'll just happily point her finger at me though it was my brother's fault..same mistakes committed bt wad i faced will be different from my brother...when my brother doesnt picks up the hair after showering she wun make a single noise, neither will my father...but when its me, ha tts a total different story..she can rattle off for more than half an hour..whenever she is unhappy with my brother, she wun tell him off but she will come to me and complain for god knows how long even though it is OBVIOUS that i am studying..(ha now you know why i insist on studying in libraries) i mean wads the point of telling me all these when its now MY fault??? trust me, she can certainly turn things round till i'm blame-able...(as a sister, shouldnt you..........)

if not for the birth cert, i might suspect tt i dun truly belong to this family...

don't treat me like a gem when you need me and like a bag of rubbish when you don't...coz you seriously have no idea how much it stings....